{"id":2302,"date":"2011-11-29T15:04:00","date_gmt":"2011-11-29T20:04:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/update.midlandps.org\/?p=2302"},"modified":"2011-12-12T07:56:30","modified_gmt":"2011-12-12T12:56:30","slug":"is-it-love","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/update.midlandps.org\/index.php\/2011\/11\/is-it-love\/","title":{"rendered":"Is it love?"},"content":{"rendered":"

By Tom Wheadon
\n<\/strong>managing feature<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cI love you,\u201d the fourteen year old boy said.<\/p>\n

\u201cI love you too,\u201d his girlfriend replied.<\/p>\n

High school is a place full of teen angst, raging hormones and deliberate drama. At the heart of this, or perhaps because of this, there are high school couples. These typically consist of a boy and a girl looking for some sort of security or significance; they want to feel important, wanted or \u201cloved.\u201d<\/p>\n

There are many other factors behind teenagers\u2019 decisions to engage in relationships at a relatively young age, such as conforming to social norms and the belief that it\u2019s an integral part of \u201cfitting in\u201d.<\/p>\n

\u201cOne of the reasons people date is cultural – what you see in your family and friendship circles,\u201d psychology teacher Kathryn Snyder said.<\/p>\n

Many students hold similar views, such as sophomore Chase Bachman.<\/p>\n

\u201c[People] date because society sculpts them into thinking they should,\u201d Bachman said.<\/p>\n

Despite a wide range of motives for dating, there are three types of relationships that feature most prominently within the halls of a high school. One of the most evident forms are that of the \u201cOMG, I LOVE YEW SEW MUCH\u201d couples. This is the result of two over eager teens who are usually new to dating. Despite proudly professing their love for each other repeatedly through Facebook and with public displays of affections, they rarely last longer than a month or two. They still manage to annoy their peers during this time however, such as senior Audrey Waterman.<\/p>\n

\u201cThey need a good understanding of reality,\u201d Waterman said. \u201cThey need to grow up.\u201d<\/p>\n

Snyder attributes these sorts of couples to the stage of relationships, of which there are there are eight in total.<\/p>\n

\u201cIn the first stage they see through rose-coloured glass,\u201d Snyder said. \u201cThey date for a few months and it\u2019s glorious, but then the first time there\u2019s any sign of trouble, they\u2019re out of the window.\u201d <\/p>\n

The next type of relationship doesn\u2019t have an appropriate name. It\u2019s no secret that certain students engage in physical \u201cactivities\u201d outside of schools other than rec soccer and CCL basketball. These couples are fuelled by a bizarre unspoken competition amongst male adolescents who are constantly trying to prove their masculinity to others and themselves. <\/p>\n

The last noteworthy sort of high school couple are those in a so-called \u201cserious\u201d relationship. These are students who believe they\u2019ve found their soul mate, despite the fact they\u2019ve never met anyone outside of their school district. They express their love for each other frequently, though they are more reserved in public, make plans for the future as if they\u2019ll always be together, and act as though their shared \u201clove\u201d is something profound and unique that no one else can understand.<\/p>\n

\u201c[Teenagers] in generals are in the stage of Identity vs. Role <\/p>\n

Confusion, where you\u2019re figuring out what you want to be, who you want to be and what your life is going to be like,\u201d Snyder said, referencing Erik Erikson, a developmental psychologist and psychoanalyst. \u201cThe next stage which takes place is Intimacy vs. Isolation \u2013 and that\u2019s when you\u2019re looking for long-term relationships.\u201d<\/p>\n

Snyder believes that some individuals may be combining these two stages in high school, the result of which are students looking for long term boyfriends of girlfriends. <\/p>\n

Now the why and how has been covered, it\u2019s important to look at what individuals gain from dating. Waterman, who has a boyfriend of her own, thinks that the greatest benefit is gaining an idea of what\u2019s it\u2019s like to be in a serious commitment. <\/p>\n

\u201cIt helps you prepare for dating in college,\u201d Waterman said. \u201cYou want to know a variety of people and what kinds you get along with. It also helps you learn who you are, and what you want in life.\u201d<\/p>\n

Marcus Hjalber, who has had five girlfriends in four years, has a similar mentality.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s a learning experience and it gets you ready for the future,\u201d Hjalber said.<\/p>\n

Snyder views this time for teens as a period for safe trial and error.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou figure out what works for you. It\u2019s a way of growing,\u201d Snyder said. \u201cYou start to develop the idea of what you think you want in a long-term relationship. And sometimes people do find that in high school, and they marry their high school sweet heart, but more likely not.\u201d<\/p>\n

Dating in high school has become a social norm, and while it certainly does have its benefits, those who perceive their relationship as an epic romance are going too far. There\u2019s no need for anyone to cry themselves to sleep at night over a break up, or sacrifice friends and academics in the name of \u201clove,\u201d because relationships, like everything else that takes place in school, are simply educational experiences. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Questioning the validity of being in a relationship during high school<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[38,42],"class_list":["post-2302","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-opinion","tag-opinion-stories","tag-student-activities-dow-high"],"yoast_head":"\nIs it love? - UPDATE ONLINE<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/update.midlandps.org\/index.php\/2011\/11\/is-it-love\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Is it love? - UPDATE ONLINE\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Questioning the validity of being in a relationship during high school\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/update.midlandps.org\/index.php\/2011\/11\/is-it-love\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"UPDATE ONLINE\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/DHSUpdate\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2011-11-29T20:04:00+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2011-12-12T12:56:30+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Update\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@DowHighUpdate\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@DowHighUpdate\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Update\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"4 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/update.midlandps.org\\\/index.php\\\/2011\\\/11\\\/is-it-love\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/update.midlandps.org\\\/index.php\\\/2011\\\/11\\\/is-it-love\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Update\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/update.midlandps.org\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/be39f258dafaaac3e98f5951fe5e9198\"},\"headline\":\"Is it love?\",\"datePublished\":\"2011-11-29T20:04:00+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2011-12-12T12:56:30+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/update.midlandps.org\\\/index.php\\\/2011\\\/11\\\/is-it-love\\\/\"},\"wordCount\":815,\"commentCount\":0,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/update.midlandps.org\\\/#organization\"},\"keywords\":[\"Opinion Stories\",\"Student Activities Dow High\"],\"articleSection\":[\"OPINION\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/update.midlandps.org\\\/index.php\\\/2011\\\/11\\\/is-it-love\\\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/update.midlandps.org\\\/index.php\\\/2011\\\/11\\\/is-it-love\\\/\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/update.midlandps.org\\\/index.php\\\/2011\\\/11\\\/is-it-love\\\/\",\"name\":\"Is it love? - UPDATE ONLINE\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/update.midlandps.org\\\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2011-11-29T20:04:00+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2011-12-12T12:56:30+00:00\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/update.midlandps.org\\\/index.php\\\/2011\\\/11\\\/is-it-love\\\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/update.midlandps.org\\\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/update.midlandps.org\\\/\",\"name\":\"UPDATE ONLINE\",\"description\":\"H.H. 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